Stupidest jokes reddit

The fact that Patrick is saying this really ma

A vacationing penguin is driving his car through Arizona when he notices that the oil pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station. After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town.KamenRiderY. •. A friend of mine picked up his now-wife by walking up to her group and asking who among them had low standards. Reply reply. [deleted] •. Bonus, every time they have a fight, he can say "You knew what you were signing up for when you met me, honey." Reply reply. more replies.

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The ultimate blonde joke was when all the blondes in the world went to the "Blondes Are NOT Dumb" convention. The officiator yells into the mic, "We're all here to prove to the world that Blondes are not dumb!" The crowd goes wild. She calls a random girl up from the audience. Her name is Misty. "Okay, Misty! Here's the first question.But everyone is trying to normalize it like it's real. Its not, its stupid and confusing. And it makes the whole LGBT community look like a joke.Say what you want about deaf people. I know a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work. A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police. He's now a seasoned veteran. I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.My first night away at college, all the 50+ girls on floor had an ice breaker of telling a joke. I lost my shit when someone said this one and ended up needing my inhaler. Managed to calm down after that. Between jokes, my future BFF, who I did not know yet, turned and looked me dead in the eyes and went “a stick”.Sources. 'Filtration Efficiencies of Nanoscale Aerosol by Cloth Mask Materials Used to Slow the Spread of SARS-CoV-2'. Low-cost measurement of face mask efficacy for filtering expelled droplets during speech. 2 shots of Pfizer vaccine 88% effective against Delta variant. Strong Social Distancing Measures In The United States Reduced The COVID ...A: I don't know, and I don't care. A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry we don't serve food here". A string walks into a bar and the bartender points to a sign that says "no strings allowed". So the string goes outside, ties himself up, messes up his hair and comes back into the bar. The bartender yells "aren't you that string ...When it comes to making people laugh, having a repertoire of good jokes can be a valuable asset. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood at a social gathering or add some humor ...So the joke here is that the current sanitation commissioner, because the brake line was cut, should have been there before the debate…since he couldn’t stop. So Homer is a) making a joke and b) casually admitting to attempted murder. Edit: apparently the term “head garbageman” is “sanitation commissioner.”My dad's old classic: "I used to have really bad nightmares. One time, I had a dream I was stuck eating a giant marshmallow. And then, when I woke up, my pillow was gone!" Annoyed the heck out of me because he litterally told that joke to all of my cousins almost every time we saw them. Reply reply.A man walks into a library and orders fish and chips. The librarian says, "this is a library." The man, says, "oh. Sorry." (Then in a whisper) "I'd like some fish and chips." Stephen Wright has some great short jokes: "I once bought some used paint.Apparently without meaning to. A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked what the rabbit´s blood type was, and the rabbit replied¨I´m probably a Type O¨. Wow that took me longer than it should have. The joke is normally "a pastor, a priest, and a rabbi", right.Mar 21, 2024 · 23. Which sign is most likely to crack jokes during serious situations to lighten the mood? Laughter is a remedy for tension and seriousness. 24. Which sign is most likely to snort while laughing and then laugh even harder? Their laughter becomes a contagious cycle. 25. Which sign is most likely to laugh at their clumsy moments?Maybe too long, I'm not sure. Also works best with overblown Irish accents and appropriate nun-sounding names. Two nuns are driving down the road when Dracula jumps out. "Quickly," says the first, "show him your cross". The other winds down the window, leans out and yells "Get out of the road you goofy bastard!"I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is "the stupidest country in the world." Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world. Share Add a CommentNay, it be P, for without it, a pirate be only irate. 70K votes, 14K comments. 47M subscribers in the AskReddit community. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions.A physicist, an engineer, and a statistician are staying at a hotel, when a small fire breaks out in their room. The physicist says "if we can cut off the supply of oxygen to the fire, then it will eventually burn out!" The engineer says "We can use the materials in this room to design something to smother the fire!"InvestorPlace - Stock Market News, Stock Advice & Trading Tips If you think Reddit is only a social media network, you’ve missed one of... InvestorPlace - Stock Market N...Someplace cheep. A horse goes into a restaurant. The host says, “Hey!”. The horse replies, “You read my mind.”. What month of the year has 28 days? All of them. What did the envelope say ...These jokes from Ask Reddit are stupid enough to get a laugh. 1. I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I’ll let you know. 2. Conjunctivitis.com. That’s a sight for sore eyes. 3. I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey.Reply reply. Essem7631. •. My favorite one: A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30000 loan to take a holiday." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger ...

ADMIN MOD. What's the most horrible, messed up joke you've ever heard? Here's mine: What sound does a baby make in the Microwave? I don’t know, I was too busy masturbating! EDIT: To those that downvoted this, I can't blame you. It's kinda terrible, but me and my friends were exchanging terrible jokes so I thought I'd see what the witty people ...So the joke here is that the current sanitation commissioner, because the brake line was cut, should have been there before the debate…since he couldn’t stop. So Homer is a) making a joke and b) casually admitting to attempted murder. Edit: apparently the term “head garbageman” is “sanitation commissioner.”My first night away at college, all the 50+ girls on floor had an ice breaker of telling a joke. I lost my shit when someone said this one and ended up needing my inhaler. Managed to calm down after that. Between jokes, my future BFF, who I did not know yet, turned and looked me dead in the eyes and went “a stick”.There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home.

Reply reply. _easy_. •. "Tough to imagine that you could have insecurities because nothing stands out about you in the first place." Reply reply. [deleted] •. Wow, that may genuinely be the cruelest non-specific insult I have ever heard. Reply reply more repliesMore replies.Say what you want about deaf people. I know a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work. A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police. He's now a seasoned veteran. I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.…

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Polar bears are highly intelligent and are known to understand English well enough to comprehend humour. If you don't believe me, just tell your joke to a Polar bear and see if it laughs. 5. Reply. 2M3TAL4U.The implication being that it got there because it is stupid. I personally believe any bear that can navigate all the way from arctic to jungle has got to be pretty smart. Maybe the bear is super intelligent compared to other arctic animals but the Jungle is like a gifted class and it finds he isn't smart at all compared to those smarty-pants ...

The implication being that it got there because it is stupid. I personally believe any bear that can navigate all the way from arctic to jungle has got to be pretty smart. Maybe the bear is super intelligent compared to other arctic animals but the Jungle is like a gifted class and it finds he isn't smart at all compared to those smarty-pants ...There are obvious jobs, sure, but there are also not-so-obvious occupations that pay just as well. When everyone seems to be making more money than you, the inevitable question is ...

Reply reply. _easy_. •. "Tough to imagine that you could hav Nay, it be P, for without it, a pirate be only irate. 70K votes, 14K comments. 47M subscribers in the AskReddit community. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Sometimes, people come up with things they think aAlthough humor is subjective, one of the funniest jokes according to Back in middle school, my friends and I had a running joke where we would add "said the dead goat" to anything stupid that one of us said. During a school hike we had found a chasm that was full of goat skeletons, and we ended up …With an itheberg. 4. I was at the funeral of a friend of mine. His wife asked me if I could say a quick word. I stood at the front, cleared my throat, choked back the tears, and said, "Plethora ... The hip replacement joke, “Hip replacement? He was never So the joke here is that the current sanitation commissioner, because the brake line was cut, should have been there before the debate…since he couldn’t stop. So Homer is a) making a joke and b) casually admitting to attempted murder. Edit: apparently the term “head garbageman” is “sanitation commissioner.”One of the key aspects of successful content marketing is capturing your audience’s attention. During the holiday season, people are often looking for light-hearted and entertainin... ☭☭☭ COME SHITPOST WITH US ON DISCORD, COMRADES ☭☭☭ ThisThe fact that Patrick is saying this really makes the joke. BecausJan 26, 2023 · Like 1.8M. Sometimes, people come up InvestorPlace - Stock Market News, Stock Advice & Trading Tips If you think Reddit is only a social media network, you’ve missed one of... InvestorPlace - Stock Market N... Jan 16, 2024 · Priscilla Du Preez. These jokes fro That joke has been around for at least 40 years. Source: When I was a kid I bought a book at a flea market called "New York City Cab Drivers Joke Book." It was published in the 70s and that joke was in it. Reply reply. Nine_Cats. •• Edited. The black jokes a[Maybe too long, I'm not sure. Also works The funniest sub on Reddit. Hundreds of jo I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is "the stupidest country in the world." Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world. Share Add a CommentHere are some helpful Reddit communities and threads that can help you stay up-to-date with everything WordPress. Trusted by business builders worldwide, the HubSpot Blogs are your...